Thursday, November 30, 2006

Surprising

Like many angst ridden middle-aged men I have a soft spot in my heart for 'The Who' as being the british-invasion band that most related to my awkward post-pubescence. This affection has survived about a quarter-century of making nothing new and going on endless lucrative tours as a loud caberet act (albeit a damn good one). Meanwhile, half the band, its peerless rhythm section died away and the front men go on.

So, with some reluctance I did manage to to out and buy their new album and damned if expecting it to rather suck, it was actually quite good. Certainly better than their last couple albums back in what, the early Reagan years? God I'm old, but not as old as Messrs. Townshend and Daltrey.

Anyhoo, 'Wire & Glass' is actually good, and the best song on it is befitting a pair of sixty year old men, in that it is not really rocking at all. Rather, it is somewhat Dylanesque, only with a better singer and more spiritual bent (basically telling organized religion to "suck it"). It's "Man in a Purple Dress" -- as performed on Letterman a couple months ago.



Thus endeth my rare statement on music.

This guy's diplomatic skills make Bush look like fuckin' Talleyrand


Look, it's just common sense, don't go to Istanbul and declare Jesus prevailing over Mohammad in a split decision!

(AFP/Pool/Dimitri Messinis)

Yeah, just a few words of advice Your "Holiness"


I'd go for more "holy" less "Batman Villain".

REUTERS/Anatolian/Kenan Cimen

I mean seriously, has there been a creepier looking religious figure since they passed Khomeni died and got passed around like a poopoo platter?+




*other than Ted Haggard

"Sadr you magnificent bastard!"

"I can barely read!"

excellent! [Kathryn Jean Lopez]

Baker commission to Recommend the exact opposite of what is needed:

Iraq Panel to Recommend Pullback of Combat Troops
By David E. Sanger and David S. Cloud New York Times November 30, 2006


Posted at 6:08 AM

Yes, Kathryn Lopez ladies and gentlemen. Knows as much about military history and strategy as she does about sex.

In Amman's Best Hotel, 3 a.m.

His Chimperial Heinous sleeps the sleep of the unjust.

(*snoring and speaking in sleep*)
BUSH: No mommy, no, bad touch...*snorts* does tickle though...he he he.

SUDDENLY a NOISE!

The groggy President sits up in his bed startled

BUSH: Cindy Sheehan? She found me!

A shimmering white, but still blurry vision materializes at the foot of the bed.

BUSH: Oh man, too much Wild Turkey, better start drinking Jenny-O Wiskey instead.

The vision solidifies, revealing a man dressed in glowing white robes with long-hair and a beard appears bearing a benevolent smile.

BUSH: Oh, no, mormons -- what are you, one of Romney's people? And here I am without my special underoos on.

...oh wait. Oh my, it's that guy from that Mel Gibson movie, um, what was that called? Um...jeez, this is tough. He was jewish and stuff.

VISITOR: It is I, who you call Jesus.

BUSH: Thanks, but that wasn't it.

VISITOR: George W. Bush, it is I, Jesus of Nazareth.

BUSH: Oh yeah. Hey, how ya' doin'? How'd you get in here?

VISITOR: Well, it's on the way to Damascus. (Makes drummer appear to do a riff)

BUSH: I don't get it. Anyway, I'm like busy and stuff Lord, I've got important things to do spreading freedom and marching progress. You know, holy stuff. I'm doin' your work because you were too lazy to, in the words of the prophet Larry the Cable Guy, 'git r done'

VISITOR: I am here to teach you, how to resolve your problems, how to end the scourge of war.

BUSH: What?

VISITOR: It is time for you to learn the way to truth.

BUSH: But, ah already know the way to truth, and truth is whatever ah believe, 'cause I'm a truth-speakin' guy, 'cause I'm plain spoken and plain spoken people never lie. Besides, you know that we both share the same father.

VISITOR: Um, yeah, about that.

BUSH: Hey, you know ah'm right. There's the trinity for example. There's dad, there's you, and then the Holy Me.

VISITOR: Well, I'm afraid you are misunderstanding a couple things.

BUSH: Are you calling my mommy a liar, jew boy?

VISITOR: Look, you must learn that you cannot use others to carry out your will, nor force your will upon others. People must gather and solve their own problems. Remember blessed are the peacemakers?

BUSH: You're wrong! (gets out of bed) That's so gay! C'mon you dirty hippie let's wrestle.

VISITOR: What?

BUSH: Take that (Bush punches the visitor below the belt) RIGHT IN THE SACRAMENTS!


And so, Dear Leader lost the last chance to save his pathetic ass from infamy.

"Psych!"



REUTERS/Jim Young

"Awkward!"



REUTERS/Jim Young

And now, the History Channel Reenacts Bush's Phone Call to Maliki Yesterday

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Quote of the Day

From the WaPo article on Webb:

"He's not a typical politician. He really has deep convictions," said Schumer, who headed the Senate Democrats' campaign arm. "We saw this in the campaign. We would have disagreements. But when you made a persuasive argument, he would say, 'You're right.' I am truly not worried about it. He understands the need to be part of a team."


Thank the almighty then that we are getting some people in there with deep convictions.

It is to laugh

Shorter Bush:

"Jim Webb why won't you keep quiet and just let me put your son's life at risk so I can cover my ass for my colossal fuck up?"


If you are upset by the President doing this, according to America's Slump-Buster, you are "classless".

(What's a "slumpbuster" preciousssss? Well, it's a vile-phrase created by a vile person on another vile person's show...now applied to yet another vile person).

Shorter American Punditry & Politicians

Oh sure, we invaded your country; occupied it like the imperial power we like to pretend we aren't; dissolved your army and your civil service; upended all your institutions; killed as many as 650,000 of your population of about 25 million; keep forgetting to get you reliable electricity; never provided adequate security in one form or another; used the occasional 500 and 1,000 pound bombs against wedding parties and funerals; and then just ignored the situation as everything went to hell because "freedom is messy".

But it is your fault for NOT appreciating it in the proper context (you know the context we tell you to appreciate it in -- after all we painted some of your goddamn schools!). So, fuck you!

And we have "Lift-Off"


The "Air Force One Burritos" kick in just in time for Dear Leader's favorite joke. Well second favorite, the favorite came seconds later when he blamed Condi.

REUTERS/Peter Andrews(LATVIA)

And Condi *sighs*


He still can't distinguish between 'Live Long and Prosper' and 'The Shocker'.

It can be both painful and embarrassing.

REUTERS/Ints Kalnins(LATVIA)

The "Wise" Men

The post-hoc evaluations of enablers of this disastrous Iraqi War like Friedman make me sick:

On Feb. 12, 2003, before the war, I wrote a column offering what I called my “pottery store” rule for Iraq: “You break it, you own it.” It was not an argument against the war, but rather a cautionary note about the need to do it with allies, because transforming Iraq would be such a huge undertaking. (Colin Powell later picked up on this and used the phrase to try to get President Bush to act with more caution, but Mr. Bush did not heed Mr. Powell’s advice.)

But my Pottery Barn rule was wrong, because Iraq was already pretty broken before we got there — broken, it seems, by 1,000 years of Arab-Muslim authoritarianism, three brutal decades of Sunni Baathist rule, and a crippling decade of U.N. sanctions. It was held together only by Saddam’s iron fist. Had we properly occupied the country, and begun political therapy, it is possible an American iron fist could have held Iraq together long enough to put it on a new course. But instead we created a vacuum by not deploying enough troops.


All of these things were apparent BEFORE we invaded, Tommy-Boy you wrote as the so-called voice of authority on the Middle East. You fucking blew it.

So stop your fucking rationalizations.

Let us fucking hippies make some decisions for a while.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Something for a Long-Time Customer



(AP Photo/Kirsty Wigglesworth)

Simply Murder

Right now, I think the next two years are clear.

Iraq is Bush's legacy -- a monumental strategic disaster that relegates him to historical infamy -- along with his enablers and they are legion. From the neocons like Wolfowitz & Feith, Laurie Myolrie, John Bolton and William Kristol; to American imperialists like Dick Cheney, John McCain, Joe Lieberman and Donald Rumsfeld; to those who fall into the cult of Bush like Rove, Rice & Hadley. And finally, the media punditry which falls between the camps from the establishment like Broder, to liberal imperialists like Peter Beinart and finally the entire right-wing blogosphere who set a new standard for cheerleading the cheerleader.

Now a group of individuals come forth to try to make the "least bad loss" in the Iraq Study Group.

But no matter the recommendation, as Atrios has stated, it will all come down to Bush NEVER conceding the implications of his policy, of never accepting plain defeat, of settling for anything that will make him look like a failure. And to Bush that means leaving without his pony.

There is, therefore, only one thing that Bush & Rove can do. Find a way to place the blame elsewhere.

Bush will NEVER -- EVER -- start withdrawing troops on his own volition as it equals defeat. No, what they will do is quite simple.

He will force the hand of a Democratic Controlled Congress and make them do it for him. Eventually, they will be forced to cut the pursestrings. The overseas trips and digging out the old "It's Al Qaeda's doing" are for the sole purpose of Bush saying "okay we've really turned the corner this time" and somebody (just pick any pundit, they'll all be doing it) will proclaim once again, that we've gotta give this new plan another six months (F.U.s uber alles). And then five months and two-weeks later, voila, time for another pretend summit! Eventually the Democrats will have to say enough -- it won't be George Bush. Meanwhile soldiers continue to die with Iraqis in one of the cruelest farces ever wrought.

Thus a failed policy lingers and continues, so just like Vietnam, the right-wing can draw up a fiction -- that we would have won in Iraq if the Democrats didn't force us into defeat. Bush and his "Think-Tankers" can pretend that it all would have worked out great, but for those meddling liberals.

And then a month or two after withdrawal, Michelle Malkin can make up a story about how returning troops were spat on and the circle will be complete.

Some may call this craven plan "politics" -- those people we would call PUNDITS.

But to the rest of us, it is simply murder.

UPDATE:

And like clockwork:

RIGA, Latvia - President Bush, under pressure to change direction in Iraq, said Tuesday he will not be persuaded by any calls to withdraw American troops before the country is stabilized.

"There's one thing I'm not going to do, I'm not going to pull our troops off the battlefield before the mission is complete," he said in a speech setting the stage for high-stakes meetings with the Iraqi prime minister later this week. "We can accept nothing less than victory for our children and our grandchildren."

THERE! Saved ya' $499,999,000


Unless it's already been reserved by Cheney.


Of course, if Halliburton performs this alteration for you the invoice you receive may end up being $500 million, but surely you'd never fall for that...more than three or four thousand times.

Rocks their World

Idiot.

Jeebus, if Matt Drudge was any more gullible, he'd be a "Note" reader.


Via Raw Story.

Shylock Holmes

Pat Buchanan, absolves Pooty-Poot of any complicity in murdering anybody -- especially a political dissident.

Naturally, in Buchanan's world this can mean only one thing.

A couple of Jews did it.


Yep, his "logic" is just that solid.

Obviously a conservative pundit can say fucking anything and keep getting put out in the mass media.

Anyone else got the feeling...

That Bush's middle east trip is less about Iraq than it is about getting cash for his Library and "Double-Think Tank"?

Nice Job Junior

At this rate, he's gonna have to get that $500 Million from one person (and that's a big chunk for Poppy):
President Bush's approval ratings fell to the second-lowest of his presidency, according to a new Harris Interactive poll.

According to the telephone poll, conducted between Nov. 17 and Nov. 21, 31% of U.S. adults called Mr. Bush's job performance "excellent" or "good" -- down from 34% who gave a positive assessment in a late-October poll; 67% said his performance is only "fair" or "poor," up from 63% in the previous survey. The president's lowest approval rating in a Harris poll was 29% in May 2006.

Monday, November 27, 2006

The Jerk



That would be appointed President.

Talk of Resurrecting a Moribund Presidency

I'm busy today trying to make a living so I only had, oh let's see, enough time to type "historical presidential popularity numbers" in google to find this information. So there is probably more out there readily available to anyone who wants to spend the time but I just had to do this to prove a small but fine point. It is useless to compare how Clinton and Reagan did it, they were both relatively popular Presidents, even if not trusted by a great majority of Americans.

Astonishingly, Bill Clinton's popularity broke the 70 percent mark only once: right after he was impeached by the House of Representatives, when he registered 73 percent. Throughout his second term in office, despite the Lewinsky scandal, Clinton's ratings were good and remarkably stable, averaging in the low 60s -- far better than in his first two years in office when they had languished mostly in the 40s.

Ronald Reagan's popularity started out in the low 50s, then jumped to a 68 percent high-point after the failed attempt on his life in March, 1981. The full John Hinckley bounce lasted only two months, however. Reagan's numbers didn't climb back into the 60s until after his big 1984 re-election victory.


I, for one, am going to enjoy the death rattle I hear deep within the respiratory system of the Bush White House. Talk all you want about resurrection folks, it isn't going to matter. People can't stand President Bush.

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

We have done the unthinkable--made ordinary Iraqis miss Saddam Hussein. Really it takes the breath away when you consider just how far off the path to "freedom" we have drug those poor people.

Sadly, his Nixon impression is not yet fully developed


And Bush plans on coming back to the White House.

(AP Photo/Ron Edmonds)

Some whiny, high pitched, inarticulate moron

Interviewed here.

Bush raises cash for "American Museum of Irony"

A library where apes evolved from men?

Inside will be 50 million copies of "The Pet Goat":

He may be a certified lame duck now, but President Bush and his truest believers are about to launch their final campaign - an eye-popping, half-billion-dollar drive for the Bush presidential library.

Eager to begin refurbishing his tattered legacy, the President hopes to raise $500 million to build his library and a think tank (ed: the irony, it burns, it BURNS!) at Southern Methodist University in Dallas. Bush lived in Dallas until he was elected governor of Texas in 1995...

...The half-billion target is double what Bush raised for his 2004 reelection and dwarfs the funding of other presidential libraries. But Bush partisans are determined to have a massive pile of endowment cash to spread the gospel of a presidency that for now gets poor marks (ed: i.e. "I'll give you $10,000 to rank him higher than Pierce!") from many scholars and a majority of Americans.


That George W. Bush will be associated with anything labeled a "library" or "think tank" is about as far as reality can bend. In fact, I can see it red-shifting before me right now.

Post-Thanksgiving Turkey

Well, the holiday prevented me from spending time on the internets looking for those pearls of so-called analogous wisdom that right-wing bloviators like to to throw out during times of intellectual bankruptcy (apparently they have a decades long supply).

And who should toss out the follwoing bon mot but Peggy Noonan:

More and more our leaders forget the common sense of grandma. In most everyone's family there was a grandma who used to sit quietly in the corner and say nothing. Then someone would ask her opinion just to be polite, and she'd say something so wise, so commonsensical, it stopped everyone in their tracks. And you realized that she was smart, that she'd lived a life and seen things.

In the case of illegal immigration in America I think grandma would say, "Stop it. Build a wall. But put doors in the wall so when the problem is over, you can open the doors."


I'm guessing that Noonan's grandmother would blurt out every holiday, three simple words of stunning profundity:

"SHUT UP PEGGY!"
Nooner's in her post-menopausal years now, as moronic as her blue-blooded WASPesque pedigree (h/t to ProfWombat) is, she conveniently forgets that for many people her age, Grandma was a goddamned immigrant who got into this country because there was not a "wall" high enough to keep them out. Jeebus, the basic imbecility is progressively more galling.

Mitt Romney: Ideological Bigamist

When running for Governor of Massachusettes:

Me likey teh gay!



When running for President:

Me hatey teh gay!



This is hypocrisy at its finest. Even his internet girlfriend, K-Lo is consistent both in her hate of gay rights and her love of pork chops.

I guess they'll be up for banning "Silent Night" next

Unbelievable, I'm posting the entire article because the comedy (and stupidity) is thick in this one:

DENVER - A homeowners association in southwestern Colorado has threatened to fine a resident $25 a day until she removes a Christmas wreath with a peace sign that some say is an anti-Iraq war protest or a symbol of Satan.

Some residents who have complained have children serving in Iraq, said Bob Kearns, president of the Loma Linda Homeowners Association in Pagosa Springs. He said some residents have also believed it was a symbol of Satan. Three or four residents complained, he said.

"Somebody could put up signs that say drop bombs on Iraq. If you let one go up you have to let them all go up," he said in a telephone interview Sunday.

Lisa Jensen said she wasn't thinking of the war when she hung the wreath. She said, "Peace is way bigger than not being at war. This is a spiritual thing."

Jensen, a past association president, calculates the fines will cost her about $1,000, and doubts they will be able to make her pay. But she said she's not going to take it down until after Christmas.

"Now that it has come to this I feel I can't get bullied," she said. "What if they don't like my Santa Claus."

The association in this 200-home subdivision 270 miles southwest of Denver has sent a letter to her saying that residents were offended by the sign and the board "will not allow signs, flags etc. that can be considered divisive."

The subdivision's rules say no signs, billboards or advertising are permitted without the consent of the architectural control committee.

Kearns ordered the committee to require Jensen to remove the wreath, but members refused after concluding that it was merely a seasonal symbol that didn't say anything. Kearns fired all five committee members.


I'm just guessing that Kearns is a die-hard Rush listener.

On Christmas Eve, I assume he skips the part of Silent Night that discusses "heavenly peace".

Here, by the way is the "offending" wreath:


(AP Photo/provided by Lisa Jensen)

I-d-i-o-t!

Found via AmericaBlog.

If I was a NY Giant fan

I would at least take solace in the fact that the NY Post will maintain some sense of decorum and proportionality about the team's three straight losses.

TITANIC CHOKE GAGS BIG BLUE

Or not.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Leadership

Just quick food for thought.

There are many things that separate great leaders from awful ones.

But I would posit that the greatest separation is the capacity for learning and allowing events to change your mind. It's not uniquely American, but nonetheless I think it is fair to say that those two individuals considered the "GREATEST" Americans over the generations, Washington and Lincoln both made a LOT of mistakes, and were quite flawed. This is especially true when it comes to military questions and policies. The mythological Washington is far from the actual figure, and the actual figure, who was hardly a military genius and importantly knew he wasn't suffers for it -- he rarely won a military battle, yet managed to win a war. Lincoln's ability to adapt and ultimately both lead and follow on the important questions of the War make him arguably the Greatest President, Washington's ability to reflect make him perhaps the Greatest American.

Now compare to George W. Bush who is sure he is right about everything and has no capacity to adapt to fuckall.

Yet, he is not the first, or only American politician (see McCain, John & Lieberman, Joe) to not learn this lesson -- simply the worst. The lesson is, the greatest leaders admit their own failings and learn from them.

But not Dear Leader, making him the first real challenger to the title of WORST PRESIDENT EVAH, since Warren Harding stroked out of office more than 80 years ago.

"You're right Crown Prince..."


"that Bed & Breakfast scene in 'BORAT' was truly frighteningly."

(AFP/SPA-HO)

A Plea for 2010 -- Non-Partisan Redistricting

Here is Iowa -- home of one of the most homogenous populations in the country, we have a non-partisan redistricting process that has worked pretty well. When tidal wave elections come, as this year, this state went from being 4/5ths Republican to 3/5th Democratic. Here is more information on Iowa's redistricting process.

Frankly, if we were the old days (and to some extent the bad-old days) of districting, before it became a science mixed with voting rights laws, this election would have probably produced as many as twice the number of House seats switching hands.

Though I agree that the voting rights laws have been beneficial for jump-starting much needed African-American political representation; it also often broadly works towards a creation of too many safe seats for the extremes and a lack of broad consensus in the name of creating safe-districts which I think is now a greater danger.

I am decidedly NOT a demographer, nor an expert on the matter, but I am a believer in the system Iowa uses, while acknowledging there is a demographic fact about Iowa that makes non-partisan redistricting easier, the state is overwhelmingly white and culturally non-diverse. However, it is also very balanced between Republicans and Democrats without an extensive history of underhanded political deals and that may make a difference as well.

Would such a plan endanger the "existing" Democratic majority? Maybe a little, but I rather doubt it all things considered, as politically the Democrats have long-enjoyed generally more popular broad policies. Non-partisan redistricting is, in my opinion, the more democratic solution to the "term-limits" idea pushed by the GOP before they had a chance for perpetual rule.

But what do you people think?

The End

It's becoming pretty evident that the Baker Commission is more and more irrelevant.

BAGHDAD, Iraq - Followers of the militant Shiite cleric Muqtada al-Sadr took over state-run television Saturday to denounce the Iraqi government, label Sunnis "terrorists" and issue what appeared to many viewers as a call to arms.

The two-hour broadcast from a community gathering in the heart of the Shiite militia stronghold of Sadr City included three members of al-Sadr's parliamentary bloc, who took questions from outraged residents demanding revenge for a series of car bombings that killed some 200 people Thursday.

With Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki relegated to the sidelines, brazen Sunni-Shiite attacks continue unchecked despite a 24-hour curfew over Baghdad. Al-Sadr's Mahdi Army militia now controls wide swaths of the capital, his politicians are the backbone of the Cabinet, and his followers deeply entrenched in the Iraqi security forces. Sectarian violence has spun so rapidly out of control since the Sadr City blasts, however, that it's not clear whether even al-Sadr has the authority - or the will - to stop the cycle of bloodshed...

...Al-Maliki's administration acknowledged it was powerless to interrupt the pro-Sadr program on the official Iraqiya channel, during which Sadr City residents shouted, "There is no government! There is no state!" Several speakers described neighborhoods and well-known Sunni politicians as "terrorists" and threatened them with reprisal...

...Sunni politicians vowed to file complaints against the channel for inciting sectarian violence. Ordinary Sunnis were shocked to hear their neighborhoods singled out for attack on the government's station.

"I got four phone calls from friends telling me to change the channel to Iraqiya and see what's happening," said Mohamed Othman, 27, a Sunni resident of Ameriya, one of the districts mentioned in the program. "I think this is an official declaration of civil war against Sunnis. They're going to push us to join al-Qaida to protect ourselves."


It'll be interesting, though depressing, to find out how the White House and our punditry will try to clean this up in the next week as Bush meets with Maliki.

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Cheney seals the deal



For his future residence, the Idi Amin Estate.

(AFP/SPA-HO)


Possibility suggested by commentor Whaly.

Four most worthless words in the english language


Cheney engages in diplomacy.

I thinks that's as likely a growth as it is a TV logo.

(AP Photo/Saudi TV via APTN)

Congratulations Mr. Talky

The Iraq Invasion was has now SURPASSED, today, the length of the American involvement in World War II.
America's involvement in Iraq will reach that milestone at a time when the clamour for withdrawal has never been louder, and the possibility of achieving it has never seemed so difficult. The decisive end of World War II in 1945 delivers no lessons that could be applied to a very different war in a very different era.

If anything, things seem to be getting worse, the options less appealing. Baghdad is reeling from the deadliest assault on Iraqi civilians since the start of the US invasion in March 2003. At least 200 people died and more than 250 were injured after six car bombs, mortar attacks and missiles battered the Shiite Muslim slum of Sadr City.

Plumes of black smoke and anguished screams rose above a chaotic landscape of flames and charred cars, witnesses said.

Violence later spread to other neighbourhoods in retaliatory attacks across Baghdad, even as politicians and senior religious clerics appealed for calm.

The Iraqi Government locked down the capital with an indefinite curfew and shut the airport to commercial flights.

It is a long way from Mission Accomplished - the banner that decorated a US aircraft carrier on May 1, 2003 as the US President, George Bush, proclaimed the end of "major combat operations". Forty-four months on, Americans still count the cost of the war: more than 2860 US soldiers dead, more than 21,000 injured


And as noted in the article, by this time World War II was OVER, in Iraq it is only getting progressively worse.

Heckuva job Bushie!

Friday, November 24, 2006

Remember the Downing Street Memos

Well now other members of the commonwealth are joining in the game, showing the plot to invade Iraq well in advance:

Previously secret AWB documents have revealed that the wheat exporter was told Australia would join the war against Iraq a year before the Federal Government says it decided to commit troops.

The information came from Australia's Ambassador to the United Nations, John Dauth.

Prime Minister John Howard announced that Australian troops would join the strike on Iraq on March 1, 2003.

He said the decision was made just before that.

But AWB board notes says that early in 2002 the Australian Ambassador to the UN, Mr Dauth, said Australia would support and participate in US action.

He accurately predicted the strike to depose Saddam Hussein would start within 18 months.

The report of AWB chairman Trevor Flugge's meeting says Ambassador Dauth promised that AWB would get as much advance warning of the war as possible.

Opposition Leader Kim Beazley says the evidence of the relationship between the private wheat trader and diplomats shows there is much more to be examined.

"John Howard was prepared to take the wheat board into his confidence years before going to war, but not the Australian people," he said.

The final report of the oil-for-food inquiry is due to be handed to the Government tomorrow.


The Australians were telling agri-business in advance, but not it's own citizens. Wow, they ARE just like us.

Somebody thinks Thanksgiving is

About the 'Wild Turkey' and not the real thing. I give you the ravings of Victor Davis Tiberius Hanson:

And there really will come a time, believe it or not, when a future American President baffled and paralyzed by the latest insanity from the Middle East—whether an Iranian nuke or a Syrian invasion of Lebanon or another Middle East war or the usual assassination and killing of Americans—will ask former president George Bush II for advice, as a then fawning media will look back to his past "toughness" and "determination" when under fire. That seems unhinged now, but it too will come to pass, as they say.


Um, yeah.

You know I played "Risk" in college -- but I managed not to take its dynamics to heart as being like the real world. Too much Risk & too many viewings of Jason & the Argonauts and suddenly you fancy yourself a modern military scholar.

Ugh!

Thank God we are over there

in Iraq or things would really suck:


BAGHDAD, Nov. 24 -- A barrage of car bombs, mortar attacks and missiles battered the Shiite Muslim slum of Sadr City on Thursday afternoon, killing around 200 people and injuring as many more in the single deadliest assault on Iraqi civilians since the start of the U.S.-led invasion in March 2003.


Still think the world is better?

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Attaturk May Be Gone But I'm Still Around

I'll try to pick up the slack if only a little. We don't want you to suffer too much withdrawal. So today NPR is reporting that VP Cheney's whereabouts are unkown but there are "rumors" that he may be making a surprise visit to Iraq. The troops must be really excited.

Anyway, on this day of the month following the most deadly month in Iraq (freedom ain't free you know), just a little more death to mark our Thanksgiving. Just so we don't forget.

BAGHDAD, Iraq - A car bomb exploded in a major market in Baghdad's Sadr City Shiite slum Thursday, killing at least 10 and wounding 15, police said. As the bomb exploded three mortar shells crashed to earth nearby.


As they go to hell for a photo-op with the troops, fake turkey in hand, Cheney still has no idea the threat of death and destruction most of our soldiers live with each and every day. Yet I'm sure the security will be tight. Real tight. Imagine if they got outside the safe and secure areas how they would look.



I couldn't find the one from our archives, so I took it from from the General's archives. Thanks General.

Happy, ah, um, Thanksgiving...


"You, ah, might need a match before you go in there."

And there you have it, the "Cheney" foreign policy.

REUTERS/Jim Young



And I'm out!

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Out for Thanksgiving

Yes, it is almost time. Almost time for Atta J. Turk's favorite holiday, Thanksgiving.

Ah, the memories of a family Thanksgiving. There's no pressure to give gifts or appear holy, just spending time in the warmth and bosom of your family.

And it is that special family time that creates precious moments like:

Teaching Uncle Phil the meaning of a "bad touch" for the ninth or tenth straight year; hoping that Uncle Larry doesn't know that Aunt Phyllis is shagging Uncle Phil. And, of course, Cousin Marge who has just found out she has celiac disease and goes on and on ad nauseum about it, until somebody secretly blots the turkey with 'Wonderbread' just for the hell of it!

But mostly, Thanksgiving gives me a warm feeling in my decrepit ol' heart for one chief reason. Knowing that for thousands of "Values Conservatives" around the country this will be the day they find out that their sons or daughters are (to them) "afflicted" with "teh GAY". I don't know why exactly, but I do love the scent of nationwide karma floating about the atmosphere every 4th Thursday in November. There is, of course, nothing wrong with being gay -- rather, there is something quite wrong about being so obsessed about it's alleged ills, when there is nothing per se ill about it -- other than the hatred of it. I guess I just love seeing hypocrisy in its purest form.

And, further, based on no more evidence than I feel like it, let me state that I have a feeling this is going to be yet another memorable Thanksgiving for the Bush family.

Oh, I know the picture that they want us to have of a Bush Family Thanksgiving...


But even conservatives have to be honest that many Bush Family Thanksgivings are notable for a few regular events:

1. Jr. challenges dad to a fight after too much Wild Turkey.

2. Doro's husband tries to escape, only to be given a roofie by Babs. This leads to a really embarassing encounter for Marvin's leg.

3. Laura spends the afternoon scoping out George the Third, like Kirstie Allie checks out her pool boy.


But this year, will, I'm projecting be extra special.

For this is the year that young Barbara, fresh from her sojourn to South America tells the family that she won't be staying at the White House over the Holidays. No, she'll be staying over at Condi & Gwen Ifill's apartment, aka 'Fire Island on the Potomac'. The fact that she's coming out with those two will make it extreeeeee special for ol' Babs.

(Photo from, well, me)

Aaron Burr without the style or the guts

Bullshit Moose, whose scat has littered the land for far too long...

There are of course plenty of political people who have undergone philosophical evolutions over the years. But Mr. Wittmann, 53, has zigzagged in the extreme, from stints in left-leaning unions to right-wing policy shops. He describes his career as “eclectic,” saying he has always been drawn to independent thinkers. “The good lord has made me a contrarian,” Mr. Wittmann said.

The good lord has also blessed him with the gift of speaking in punchy and irresistible sound bites.


The Good Lord has made him a fucking asshole. May this contrarian and his fellow contrarian Chrissy Hitchens go on the biggest fucking bender in the world this holiday season and allow us a future without them.

Does that seem harsh?

Too fucking bad.

Now Mr. Wittmann will once again have to stifle his pundit proclivities to the greater good of Mr. Lieberman. “I’ve gone through this before,” he said of withdrawal from talking freely to the press. “Luckily my wife is a psychologist,” he said of his spouse of 29 years, Karen, one of the few enduring allegiances he has held faithfully.


If his wife's a psychologist, that allows him to remain "SELF-MEDICATING".

And finally, the intellect really shows itself here:

He will also be forced to suspend the Bull Moose. “The Moose is now in hibernation,” Mr. Wittmann said, adding that he is not certain if moose in fact hibernate. (They do not.)


5 seconds on fucking Wikipedia (if as a sentient being you somehow don't know this alredy)...but that's too fucking much!

Finally, in his own style let me state this:

Attaturk suggests Bullmoose shove his antlers up his own ass.

Or as Attaturk believes the Bullmoose knows it, just another day.

Your Boy Sucks!

You know many of those in attendance haven't had many chances to actually express their opinion in front of the Bush family, so in Babs words, "this is working out pretty well for them".

"My son is an honest man," Bush told members of the audience harshly criticized the current U.S. leader's foreign policy.


*Cue laugh track* or at least this!

"We do not respect your son. We do not respect what he's doing all over the world," a woman in the audience bluntly told Bush after his speech.

Bush, 82, appeared stunned as others in the audience whooped and whistled in approval.

A college student told Bush his belief that U.S. wars were aimed at opening markets for American companies and said globalization was contrived for America's benefit at the expense of the rest of the world. Bush was having none of it.

"I think that's weird and it's nuts," Bush said. "To suggest that everything we do is because we're hungry for money, I think that's crazy. I think you need to go back to school."


You have to ask at this point, what Bush Sr. was paid to go make this speech?...because I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have made it without getting paid.

And finally...the "bubble" doesn't just end with the Chimperor Disgustus, nor does the use of shallow and silly logic:

Bush said he was surprised by the audience's criticism of his son.

"He is working hard for peace. It takes a lot of guts to get up and tell a father about his son in those terms when I just told you the thing that matters in my heart is my family," he said. "How come everybody wants to come to the United States if the United States is so bad?"




Truer Words Never Spoken

Juan Cole pretty much nails the problem of Bush -- but not only him -- pretty much every conservative think-tanker of the last fifteen years, all of whom from the shallow and silly like ClifFORD May to the venal like Richard Perle to the intellectual and woefully misguided like Paul Wolfowitz:

The assassination of Lebanese cabinet minister Pierre Gemayel on Tuesday has thrown that country further into yet more turmoil.

The crisis is a further testament to the bankruptcy of George W. Bush's Middle East policy. Under the dishonest rhetoric of 'democratization,' what Bush has really been about is creating pro-American winners and anti-American losers in Afghanistan, Iraq, Palestine and Lebanon. Bush's vision is not democratic because he always installs a tyranny of the majority. The vanquished are to be crushed and ridiculed, the victors to exult in their triumph. It is like a Leni Riefenstahl film.


These clowns only have as there base reference that ALL prior American Foreign Policy is a failure -- which is patently false as well as ridiculous. They stupidly thought this prior to 9/11 and for those who were actually in power and who actually failed they have used it as the vehicle for their own crazy-ass policy choices. Decisions that have backfired each and everytime they have been applied.

The United States had more than ample ability to "blow shit up" for the years prior to Bush -- however, from FDR to Clinton -- both Parties had leaders that generally followed a foreign policy line where moderation worked for great success (the UN [oh how they hate it], NATO, nuclear arms treaties, victory in the Cold War) it is only when they ventured out of moderation that disaster occurred [Cuba, Vietnam, etc.]. But Bush has constantly deviated from this line...

...and constantly fucked up and made things far worse.

There is NEVER going to be a fucking utopia [or as the Cheney Administration defines it the United States ruling the World with an Iron Fist] you can only make things better by marginal degrees. That's realism, and that is the world we fucking have. To use 9/11 as this attempt to create this cockeyed and delusional vision underlies the great negligence and crimes of these idiots.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Well there's a stunner...

...NOT!

Marshall Wittmann, well-known Washington figure who's served John McCain, the Christian Coalition and the moderate Democratic Leadership Council, was named today as Sen. Joseph Lieberman's communications director.


Under many circumstances you might be tempted to ask "Gee, who'd he have to blow to get that job?"

But this is Bullshit Moose, so we know who he blew to get that job. And he did it repeatedly.

Uh-Oh

With Peter Jackson out, you know it's up to Lucas to make the Hobbit!




(I know it's from LOTR, but play along)

Not content with creepy pubescent girl crushes

The Derb switches teams:

Casino Royale [John Derbyshire]

Saw the new Bond movie. As Bond movies go, I'd give it 7 out of 10. This new guy is good—possibly second to Connery. He doesn't look quite right, though—too "cut" and beefy. This diminishes the gentlemanly quality that Connery carried off so well. Gentlemen are not "cut." Being "cut" speaks of vanity and trying too hard, both distinctly ungentlemanly. He is also a bit too hard—the balance not quite right there.


I have no idea what that last sentence means either.

It's been a while


But Laura finally got laid -- with bonus muff blotter.

But the pinky thing goes on.

(AP Photo/Marco Garcia)

Coming Soon -- Yet another literary sensation




I'll leave it to you to google a certain phrase if you don't know what it means.

Rather, "after Darkish"

With a Chair

The Free Range Tofu Kiev was particularly delightful this year...


(From L-R) Cast members Thomas Gibson, A.J. Cook, Kirsten Vangsness, Paget Brewster and Shemar Moore pose after accepting the Favorite Drama Ensemble award for 'Criminal Minds' during the 14th Annual Diversity Awards in Century City, California, November 19, 2006. The gala celebrated diversity, creativity and talent while raising funds for the Multicultural Motion Picture Association (MMPA). REUTERS/Mario Anzuoni (UNITED STATES)

Not pictured Michael Richards.

And now, bad news for nerds:

In a brilliant bit of "cranking money off the franchise" without any real thought, it appears that New Line studio has decided not to bring Peter Jackson back to direct "The Hobbit".

But fear not, I hear they have hired Mel Gibson. It will star Michael Richards as Gandalf. And the lead character will be named Theodore BILBO.

Monday, November 20, 2006

The New Fall Season

This is no photo-op


It's delirium tremens.

REUTERS/Jim Young

"Love your new movie. But heh, you know what's funny?"


"At Yale, I was called Pussy Galore!"


REUTERS/Jim Young

"Mr. Popularity"

Business as usual (avoid learning anything) for the Chimperor Disgustus:

BOGOR, Indonesia - President Bush's unpopularity here in the world's most populous Muslim nation made intense security jitters and angry protests the hallmarks of a six-hour trip to court Indonesian favor.

Bush arrived Monday for the second Indonesian stop of his presidency. Neither time has he spent the night, or even more than a few hours, the result of safety concerns in a place where emotions about his policies in the Middle East and the Iraq war run hot.

From a meeting and joint appearance before reporters with President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono (ed: "Silly Party") through a discussion with moderate civic leaders and a state dinner, Bush was not expected to interact with the general populace or do anything outside the confines of Bogor Palace, a graceful presidential retreat in this mountain town on the outskirts of the capital of Jakarta.


This actually works out fine for Bush as it is EXACTLY what he would do in any circumstance. You know he's traveling with his own pillow and his own private stash of jerkey, slim jims and gin.

And Cheney Smirked

RIGHT after the election!

Gasoline prices at U.S. pumps rose an average of a nickel a gallon over the last two weeks, ending three months of falling prices, according to a national survey released Sunday.

The Nov. 17 Lundberg Survey of about 5,000 gas stations across the country showed the average price of a gallon of self-serve regular gas was $2.23, a penny lower than the same week a year ago, publisher Trilby Lundberg told CNN.

Gas prices had fallen 84 cents in the previous 12 weeks, Lundberg said. The previous survey, taken on Nov. 3, showed the average at $2.18, she said.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Pathetic

It is shocking the shallowness of Bush. If there's been a more incurious President in the last century I'm unaware of them.

In 2000, tens of thousands of Hanoi’s residents poured into the streets to witness the visit of the first American head of state since the end of the Vietnam War. Mr. Clinton toured the thousand-year-old Temple of Literature, grabbed lunch at a noodle shop, argued with Communist Party leaders about American imperialism and sifted the earth for the remains of a missing airman.

On Saturday, Mr. Bush’s national security adviser, Stephen J. Hadley, conceded that the president had not come into direct contact with ordinary Vietnamese, but said that they connected anyway.

“If you’d been part of the president’s motorcade as we’ve shuttled back and forth,” he said, reporters would have seen that “the president has been doing a lot of waving and getting a lot of waving and smiles.”


Jeebus, the intimacy of driving past at 40 miles an hour.

Calvin Coolidge looks like a social butterfly in comparison -- even Reagan added depth to his actual world experience by at least imagining himself on a movie set when he was abroad.

It's not just pathetic, of course, it's rude on the most basic and understandable level. Fresh off telling the Vietnamese last week that the Americans should have stayed longer and killed more of them -- he pointedly goes out of his way to avoid dealing with any of them.

At least take the time to LOOK interested you damn simian!

I think we can probably all agree on something

From Bobo:

As I was finishing college, I was invited to Stanford with a small group of young people to discuss economics with Milton Friedman for a PBS series called “Tyranny of the Status Quo.” I was a socialist then and spent several weeks studying left-wing economic doctrine in order to rebut the great man.


Shitty, lazy, socialists in college always seem to grow up to be shitty, lazy Republicans, who use their non-learned understanding to justify their later non-understanding of anything.

Oh, thank you Karma


Thank you so much!

REUTERS/Jim Young



You'll never know what pictures like this do for my psyche,

AP Photo/Charles Dharapak



It is just great.
(AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)


Just great...
REUTERS/Jim Young (VIETNAM)

What does it remind me of?

Oh yes...




Insert your own "Borat" jokes about Laura.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Super NERD alert

Just in time for Thanksgiving.

Coming on FOX this December

Lessons From Vietnam

I've been on the same schedule as brother Attaturk and am just starting to catch my breath post election. Busy trying to make a living and now posting from Chicago. We go from the euphoria of the drubbing suffered by the Rove/Cheney administration to sending our Premier George Walter Bush to the far east to lecture the world about the "lessons of Vietnam" (see post below).

Of course when you wheel out a moron to talk about such things, what do you expect? I don't know what briefing books they gave him to read, but someone maybe ought to tell him that Vietnam has succeeded without the help of the old U.S. of A. Oh and the communists still control the government. Details.

I don't suppose someone in the boot-licking entourage could not have asked him if the lesson from our collected Vietnam experience is that powerful friends can keep you safe and out of harms way.

Compare & Contrast

General Abazaid:

"It's too soon to say we have failed" in Iraq



Tony Blair:

Iraq had “so far been pretty much of a disaster”



Abazaid then went on to make one of the lamest history comparisons ever:

Gen. John Abizaid, likened the 21st century battle against extremists to the great ideological and political clashes of the 20th century.

"Think of it as a chance to confront fascism in 1920, if we had only had the guts to do it," Abizaid said.


THIS is the man who is our top commander in the Iraq? OY!

The fact that we were actually confronting the "commies" in Russia in 1920 (giving a noticeable push in support of euro-fascism simultaneously) just blithely gets ignored and history misapplied -- as always.

Friday, November 17, 2006

Batting Practice

Do I really need to add anything?

re: Re: End the Cyclen [Kathryn Jean Lopez]
Well, I do, in fact, think that when one looks around, that "that the crass commercialization and distribution of birth control is demeaning to women, degrading of human sexuality and adverse to human health and happiness" is obvious. Evidence will be at many a bar, in many a pint of Ben & Jerry's, etc. this evening.
Posted at 10:21 AM


Although, if you can get a container of 'Chunky Monkey' up there you might be Michelle Duggar.

Dopey

Having seen "Borat" and finding it for what it was "A COMEDY" about a fictional buffoon who either shows his buffoonery or brings out the buffoonery of others it is bizarre to have to explain its obvious premise.

Sasha Baron Cohen has stepped out of character to explain the obvious:

"Borat essentially works as a tool. By himself being anti-Semitic, he lets people lower their guard and expose their own prejudices, whether it's anti-Semitism or an acceptance of anti-Semitism. 'Throw the Jew Down the Well' was a very controversial sketch, and some members of the Jewish community thought it was actually going to encourage anti-Semitism.

"But to me it revealed something about that bar in Tuscon. And the question is: did it reveal that they were anti-Semitic? Perhaps. But maybe it just revealed that they were indifferent to anti-Semitism," he said.

Baron Cohen said the concept of "indifference towards anti-Semitism" had been informed by his study of the Holocaust while at Cambridge University, where he read history. "I remember, when I was in university, and there was this one major historian of the Third Reich, Ian Kershaw. And his quote was, 'The path to Auschwitz was paved with indifference.'

"I know it's not very funny being a comedian talking about the Holocaust, but I think it's an interesting idea that not everyone in Germany had to be a raving anti-Semite. They just had to be apathetic," he said.


And there you go.

When Borat stays at a 'Bed & Breakfast' owned by a Jewish couple it makes note that these sweet people's only problem is others ridiculous anti-semetism; when Borat talks to a rodeo guy about hanging gay people, the guy quickly goes along with the idea and it reveals him to be less to be a raving homophobe, than a person that would not lift a finger if such a thing became popular in society.

Within the comedy there is a lesson...

BUT MOSTLY THERE IS COMEDY.

Jeebus, it isn't that hard to figure out.

I've been quite busy

The last two-weeks, but I want to express my appreciation to the intersection of "Mediocrity Street & Yeah, I chose to be a Virgin, yeah, that's it, "chose" Avenue" for starting up this when I returned to more active blogging:

Shorter Jonah & K-Lo - Contraception is demeaning to women


Um, yeah. Keep goin' with that one. I can just see your average campus conservative male using that line to get out of wearing a rubber.

GOOD FUCKING PLAN!

Not to be overly-rude or anything

Especially in light of my last post.

(AP Photo/Aaron Favila)

But c'mon, 80,000 yen maybe, but dollars, no effing way.

The Wonderful Morning Crew

At MSNBC, Imus & the Soulsuckers just spent a few minutes of their precious time talking about how Nancy Pelosi may have been "doable" twenty years ago but isn't anymore. Gee, no subtle sexism there. UGH!

Such is the level of thought of our media masters.

I HATE MYSELF for even overhearing them.

Awkward...

It's been 35 years, but the 'Cong still make Bush go all weak-kneed.


REUTERS/Kham (VIETNAM)

&


REUTERS/Kham (VIETNAM)


You know, that reminds me, you think Bush would have volunteered to serve "in the shit" if they had told him that the War primarily involved 'teh Ho'?

Better repent and all that...

Because the end-times are nigh:


Brazilian student Cassia Aparecida de Souza, 18, holds her cat Mimi together with what Cassia claims are Mimi's own offsprings born with dog traits last Friday, three months after mating with a neighbour's dog, in the southern Brazilian city of Passo Fundo, Rio Grande do Sul state, November 15, 2006. A geneticist from the Passo Fundo University plans to take blood samples from the animals to verify the claim by Cassia and her husband Rogerio that the puppies are part of Mimi's litter of six, of which the three that were born with cat features died soon after birth, leaving the surviving three dog-like offsprings. REUTERS/Edison Vara (BRAZIL)



Somewhere Rick Santorum just gulped deeply.

Ah, those knock-knock jokes

Well, at least they rolled her out of her efficiency fridge:

d.C. dinner report [Kathryn Jean Lopez]

I would just like to report that this year I've been in a packed Beltway ballroom with Stephen Colbert and I've been in a packed ballroom with Samuel Alito. Who had people on the floor laughing? Hint: It wasn't the guy who hosts a show on Comedy Central.

Our newest associate SCOTUS justice is an absolute hit at the Federalist Society annual dinner tonight.
Posted at 10:04 PM


Whereupon, Ms. Alito cried.

Speaking of K-Lo humor.

Anus

How the hell could he think he could get away with this statement?

HANOI, Vietnam - President Bush said Friday the United States' unsuccessful war in Vietnam three decades ago offered lessons for the American-led struggle in Iraq. "We'll succeed unless we quit," Bush said shortly after arriving in this one-time war capital.


I would have sworn that the lesson he learned is a prominent Daddy can pretty much get you out of anything.

Apparently

The market could "bare" only so much Milton Friedman.

Well, lameduck Congress, you better take an inventory of things you haven't named after Reagan and go for it.

Ladies and Gentlemen, get ready for the "Milton Friedman Center, located at the Ronald Reagan Nuclear Waste Storage Facility".

Good bye, Freedom Fries, hello Friedman Fries.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

For the person who was wondering

If I am scarce because I am on the "National Review Montezuma's Revenge Cruise"?

Um, no.

Poor Mexico, "So far from God, so close to Kate O'Beirne"

Busy bee

The Atta J. Turk, Non-Victory Tour continues at an undisclosed business-related location today so not much posting from me.

Meanwhile, until he proves otherwise, I will assume that Glenn Beck's brain was long-ago carved out and replaced with Folger's crystals and no one can tell the difference.

Sir, prove to me that you are not working without grey matter. I'm not accusing you of being souless, brainless, dickless cretin; but that's the way I feel, and I think a lot of Americans will feel that way."

This just in...

I am reminded once again, that hotel-room coffee is the WORST coffee in the world.

Seriously, if I travelled more on business, I'd do a book -- a BAD coffee-table book on the worst hotel-room coffees in the world.

It would go:

1. Chicago Hilton
2. Dubuque Holiday Inn
3. Omaha Motel Six
4. St. Louis Drury Inn - Downtown
5. St. Louis Radisson


I'm sure it would be controversial, because isn't the hotel-room coffee the REASON you stay at a particular place?

I'll tell you one other thing, the only time I ever have a Toblerone - the only time the damn thing appeals to me -- is when it is $5 via the honor bar.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

What's in a Bush?

Now that we have a lame duck congress and an even lamer duck president. How shall we talk about the incompetent who has been forced upon us? I pondered and wondered and thought about this question... and then I saw an email from the Word-A-Day folks and I believe they hit the nail right on that damn little silver head.

albatross (AL-buh-tros) noun, plural albatross or albatrosses

1. Any of the Diomedeidae family of large, web-footed seabirds.

2. A persistent wearisome burden, as of guilt, for example.

[Apparently an alteration of Portuguese or Spanish alcatraz, from Arabic al-gattas (the diver, name for a kind of sea eagle).]

Today's word in Visual Thesaurus: http://visualthesaurus.com/?w1=albatross

The name of the Alcatraz Island near San Francisco, the site of a former maximum security prison, has the same origin.

The metaphorical second sense of the term goes back to The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, a poem by Samuel Taylor Coleridge. In the poem, a mariner kills an albatross for no reason. His shooting down of the bird brings a curse to the ship, and his shipmates throw the carcass of the dead bird around his neck, thus giving a powerful idiom to the English language. As a penance, the wizened mariner wanders, recounting his tale.


Sure applies to ol Bush-leaguer, doesn't it?

Time for the RH Quiz

So, now that we have had some movement for the democrats from the elections and most of the dust has settled (although our hearts here at Hegemon HQ are pulling for Victoria Wullson in the second district in Ohio over mean Jean Schmidty). Although, what's to worry about a few thousand votes lost here and there, right? I am talking to you Florida!

So, in the spirit of the test taking time of year, we offer our first effort at a Rising Hegemon quiz. Extra points will be awarded for citizenship.

How long do we expect all of this talk about bipartisanship from the republicans to last?

A. One Month
B. One Week
C. One Day
D. It's a trick question, there will be no bipartisan effort from the republicans because they will just blame everything on the democrats, including the mess in Iraq.

Send us your answers in the comments section and we will give you a report on the outcome of the test tomorrow.

Dad's friends suck


And not one of them has offered a 'happy ending'.

(AP Photo/Pablo Martinez Monsivais)

Well, thank God

How can you really despise a culture capable of THIS late entry in the battle for designation of the Seven Wonders of the World:


A satellite photograph shows the image of Colonel Sanders, the mascot of U.S. fried-chicken restaurant chain KFC, in the desert in Nevada in this undated handout photo released November 14, 2006. Covering 87,500 sq ft, the image is claimed as the first brand visible from space.REUTERS/Weber Shandwick.

Oh give it a fucking rest...

Bill Orally starts up the War on Christmas schtick again, just after the election:

On the 1,030th day of the War on Christmas,
My true-love gave to me,
1,030 oxycontins...
...850 pounds of Roger Ailes...
...206 Murdoch mistresses...
...87 Albino Nutjobs...
...5 DRUNKEN BITTER HANNITIES!,
4 Fox & Friends groupies,
3 Missing White Women,
2 Freedom Hens
But thank God only 1 falafel from Bill Orally!

Okay,

It's World Nut Daily, but this needs some looking into given the prior post. Fox News not content with looking out for "terrorist statements" praising Nancy Pelosi's fashionable attire as "aiding" them are literally, well, aiding the terrorists.

Palestinian terror groups and security organizations in the Gaza Strip received $2 million from a United States source in exchange for the release of Fox News employees Steve Centanni and Olaf Wiig, who were kidnapped here last summer, a senior leader of one of the groups suspected of the abductions told WND.

The terror leader, from the Gaza-based Popular Resistance Committees, said his organization's share of the money was used to purchase weapons, which he said would be utilized "to hit the Zionists."


Good job Rupert.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Angemessen und ausgeglichen

Those FoxNews folks never making a shady editorial judgment:

What's so stunning

About Pelosi taking a strong-hand in the leadership fight is...

"Oh my God, an assertive, powerful Speaker?"

We haven't had one of those in nearly ten years. Compare it to the figurehead operating it the last eight-years, a rolly-polly incompetent who did whatever Tom DeLay told him to do. Who was there, ONLY because he was the harmless face of a group of right-wing power-mongers.

Of course, how dare a woman be bold and assertive in exercising power. That's not allowed in the United States.

I'm not going to just stand here and get kicked in the nuts by you people...

I'm going to turn to science?

Whaaaaaaaaaaa?

Another tricky day

More progress in Iraq:

Also Tuesday, gunmen wearing Interior Ministry commando uniforms kidnapped up to 150 staff members from a government research institute in downtown Baghdad, the head of the parliamentary education committee said.

Alaa Makki interrupted a televised parliamentary session to say reports had been received that between 100 and 150 people, both Shiites and Sunnis, had been abducted in the raid at about 9:30 a.m. He urged the prime minister and ministers of interior and defense to rapidly respond to what he called a "national catastrophe."

Cooties

Geoge Bush, the magic touch:
There's plenty of evidence to suggest that President Bush may have been the deciding factor that killed the GOP's momentum in some key Senate races over the last week. One Republican consultant is convinced that Bush's last-minute visit to Missouri on behalf of ousted GOP Sen. Jim Talent did the incumbent in. According to the network exit polls, Democrat Claire McCaskill crushed Talent among those late-breaking voters who decided in the final three days (a full 11 percent of the electorate). Bush also made a last-minute trip to Montana, where anecdotal evidence indicates the president's rally for Republican Conrad Burns stopped the incumbent's momentum in Billings.

It's hard not to look at the White House and wonder if it was flying blind


Flying blind the last 18 months only? That's a little conservative, I'd say they've been flying bling and touching cotton for six years.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Funny about that

People have speculated that I'm either a floorwax or a whipped topping.

In truth, I'm a poorly-executed bundt cake.

That's fair right?

When the Iraq Study Group report comes back, the end result will undoubtedly be one last effort to "preserve our nation's honor" -- which means, of course, to preserve the legacy of George Bush, Dick Cheney, Joe Lieberman et al.

Young kids get to die so old men don't look bad.

Same ol' same ol'.


Iraq -- also the same ol' same ol':

The Shiite prime minister promised Sunday to reshuffle his Cabinet after calling lawmakers disloyal and blaming Sunni Muslims for raging sectarian violence that claimed at least 159 more lives, including 35 men blown apart while waiting to join Iraq's police force.

Among the unusually high number of dead were 50 bodies found behind a regional electrical company in Baqouba, 35 miles northeast of Baghdad, and 25 others found scattered throughout the capital. Three U.S. troops were reported killed, as were four British service members.

Also Sunday, the country's Sunni defense minister challenged Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki's contention that the U.S. military should quickly pull back into bases and let the Iraqi army take control of security countrywide.

Defense Minister Abdul-Qadir al-Obaidi rejected calls by al-Maliki for the U.S. military to speed transfer of security operations throughout the country to the Iraqi army, saying his men still were too poorly equipped and trained to do the job.


It looks like the Democrats are, at this moment going for phased-withdrawal. Beginning well-within an F.U.

Good, as long as we admit at best a draw (and a bad one often known in common parlence as a tactical defeat) and talk to the insurgents AND Iran & Syria while we are at it.

Outdoing himself

Billmon's latest photoshoppery is right up there with Nuremberg II: Electric Boogaloo.

Mark My Words

Joe Lieberman will be a first class whiny-pain-in-the-ass for the next two years, and caucus with whatever party is in control in 2009.

In fact, I lay even odds he uses the possibility of switching parties at least twice in the next two years to stab progressives in the back. He'll be the world's whiniest Hamlet -- without the satisfying payoff in the end.

Thanks to you "blue state" Joementum Democrats in Connecticut. You'll be hearing us complain about you for the next 2,200 days or so.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Boy you cannot put one over on the Bush Administration

80-year old man is getting closer to death all the time!

Now that's some quality thinkin'!

Obvious questions with obvious answers

Juan Cole:

The US military in Iraq says that the troops are increasingly targetted by sniper fire from trained Sunni Arab guerrillas. Funny thing, when CNN reported this story, using videotape produced by the guerrillas, Lynn Cheney accused them of lack of patriotism. But here we have the US officer corps admitting the story is entirely true and quite important. So is Lynn Cheney on the side of democracy, or of its enemies? Or maybe she thinks the officer corps is full of traitors?


Lynne Cheney:

1. Is clearly not on the side of Democracy.

and

2. Should be predisposed to spotting traitors through a lifetime of faux intimacy and a half-dozen grudge fucks over the course of the last forty-five years.

Shorter Grover Norquist

A good Republican will help you move, a great Republican will help you move a body.

Although some glitz has come off Mr Rove, Republicans have been more eager to blame botched campaigns and individual ethics scandals. “Bob Sherwood’s seat [in Pennsylvania] would have been overwhelmingly ours, if his mistress hadn’t whined about being throttled,” said Mr Norquist. Any lessons from the campaign? “Yes. The lesson should be, don’t throttle mistresses.”


Fabulous human being that Grover.

Another great day of progress

Just another day in the Neo-Con wonderland:

BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- Two suicide bombers strapped with explosives killed at least 35 Iraqis and wounded 60 more Sunday outside the national police headquarters in western Baghdad, an emergency police official said.

The victims were among dozens waiting to join the police force outside the recruitment center in the Qadessiya district when the suicide bombers detonated their explosives belts.

At least 10 others died in four separate bombings, police said.

Four Iraqis died and 10 were wounded when a car bomb exploded near the Interior Ministry complex in central Baghdad.

Three Iraqis were killed and 15 wounded when a car bomb exploded in a crowded street south of Baghdad in Yusufiya.

Two Iraqis were killed and 15 wounded when a roadside bomb exploded on a busy street in southwestern Baghdad's Radhwaniya district.

And one Iraqi was killed and 5 wounded when a car bomb exploded near an outdoor market in central Baghdad's Karrada district.

On Saturday, gunmen killed a truck driver and kidnapped 11 Iraqis after stopping four vehicles at a fake checkpoint south of the capital, Hilla police said.

At the fake checkpoint in Latifiya, about 25 miles south of Baghdad, gunmen took the four vehicles -- three minibuses and a truck -- along with the kidnapped Iraqis.

The Iraqis -- 11 men and three women -- were driving from Diwaniya to Baghdad for shopping when they were stopped. The gunmen left the three women and kidnapped the 11 men, the official said.

In other violence Saturday, two bombs planted in an outdoor market in central Baghdad exploded around noon, killing six and wounded 32 people, a Baghdad emergency police official said.

North of the capital near Baquba, a suicide car bomb explosion killed two people at the main gate of a police station in Zaghanya town, an official said.

Gunmen shot dead an Iraqi officer with the new Iraqi intelligence system as he was walking towards his parked car in the southwestern Baghdad neighborhood of Bayaa, police said.

Two civilians were killed and four more were wounded when a roadside bomb hit a car in the eastern Baghdad neighborhood of Zayuna, police said.

Iraqi police also recovered 18 bullet-riddled bodies in various neighborhoods around the capital Friday. Police were unable to identify the bodies.


Yeah, we better keep this thing goin' on as long as possible.

"Not my fault"

Karl Rove continues the "personal responsibility" and rationalization pattern that has "truly" symbolized the Bush II regime:

For a man still climbing out of the rubble, Karl Rove seemed in his usual unflappable mood. He roamed around his windowless West Wing office decorated with four Abraham Lincoln portraits, joking with his staff, stuffing copies of "The Iliad" and "The Odyssey" into his bag and signing the last paperwork of the day.

The Architect, as President Bush once called him, has a theory for why the building fell down. "Get me the one-pager!" he cried out to an aide, who promptly delivered a single sheet of paper that had been updated almost hourly since the midterm elections with a series of statistics explaining that the "thumping" Bush took was not such a thumping after all.


Karl's math still tells him he's not an asshole, but rather a helpful nutritional device.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

One nice lesson of this week

The Democratic Party has learned it is NOT the political equivalent of the Arizona Cardinals.

Meanwhile: Atlas Juggs, Brian Kilmeade and Benjamin Netanyahu four entities desperately fighting reality and/or gravity.

Taking time out to dedicate...


The Mark Foley Memorial.

(AP Photo/Pablo Martinez Monsivais)

Veteran's Day

First posted in 2004. Since then about 1700 more American soldiers have died, several soldiers of other forces, and lord only knows how many Iraqis, including innocent civilians, perhaps another half-million.

Well, somewhere it will soon be the 11th hour of the 11th Day and the day arranged to commemorate the end of "The War (that failed) to end all War" will be commemorated.

Jingoism is nothing new in America, nor many other spots of the world. It took the utter devistation of the Second World War for it to finally dissipate in most of Europe (only took 1,000 years).

But the death knell of jingoism started with the slaughter of the First World War. A bloody bitter nightmare that lasted over five years and killed millions, often tens of thousands in a single day, and only finally, in reality ended in 1945.

The bloody, useless, slaughter was the primary reason that neither France nor Britain was able to stand up to Germany a generation later. Ypres, the Somme, Passchendaele, Verdun, all were too fresh on the minds of both countries. The battle death totals are staggering:

On the first day of the Somme in 1916, the British lost 58,000 men. That is the equivalent of U.S. Battle Deaths in the Vietnam Conflict, and half the total of American deaths in the First World War, 116,000 in about one year of involvement.

In one battle, Caparetto, the Italian Army had 275,000 soldiers captured.

At the Battle of Verdun, 32,000,000 artillery shells were launched by the Germans and French. Verdun which lasted from February through the end of 1916, led to 1,000,000 French and German casualties.

In the course of the war, 8,300,000 Combatants were killed; another 7,000,000 were maimed for life of the 20,000,000 or so that were wounded in some fashion. 8,000,000 civilians died from non-disease related causes.

The national totals are staggering:

325,000 . . . . . . . . .Turkish military killed
460,000 . . . . . . . . .Italian military killed
1,000,000 plus . . . . . British and Commonwealth military killed
1,200,000 . . . . . . . .Austro-Hungarian military killed
1,385,000 . . . . . . . .French military killed
1,700,000 . . . . . . . .Russian military killed
1,808,000 . . . . . . . .German military killed


The war and its tragedy, especially its constant misery and evident criminal foolishness amongst those in the trenches gave birth, as does most prolonged human suffering to great prose. Especially poetry. Siegfried Sassoon, Wilfred Owen were among the English poets. The most famous poem of the war came from a Canadian, John McCrae, a poem both avenging and tragic depending on your mood:

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.


Those who tend to glorify war, as many of those now leading our country, have rarely fought in them. Bush, Cheney, Wolfowitz, almost the whole lot of them (except for the ostracized Powell) never experienced the tragedy of futile death, the way it not only snuffs out the promise of young life, but permanently stains the soul of those who live through it. Powell's involvement in the aftermath of My Lai (and not a glorious involvement), if nothing else, showed him the way in which murderous futility can make men deprived, unthinking, murderers.

No, war is all "strategy" and the "high arching" goal to them. The soldier is the "noble" faceless tool of the end. No one considers for a moment that so many nations, including criminally wrong nations thought the same way. Look at German art in the late 1930s and note the glorification of the faceless soldier of the Wehrmacht.

Somewhere in Iraq now, is a future Wilfred Owen. One probably speaks english and another speaks arabic. Meanwhile, Bush can barely put a limerick together.

The purpose of Veteran's Day is not to celebrate the victory of the soldier, their accomplishment of a policy end. But to remember those who sacrificed, and risked their lives. Often, in our nation's history, these losses have been for nefarious or useless ends (Mexican-American War, Vietnam, and now we all know whether we want to or not, Iraq 2003-2006), as well as for noble ones.

War creates heros, but mostly it creates victims. The former is usually what politicians like Bush want to celebrate, but it is the latter that is the reality we do not like to dwell upon.

Can't Improve the AP Story & Picture

You win this time!

WASHINGTON - Legislation aimed at President Bush's once-secret program for wiretapping U.S.-foreign phone calls and computer traffic of suspected terrorists without warrants shows all the signs of not moving ahead, notwithstanding President Bush's request this week that a lame-duck Congress give it to him.


Friday, November 10, 2006

The Joke Is On Us

See, the Premier George Walter Bush thought long and hard about what is important and best for us, the American people, and here is what he thought:

Secondly, I'm an optimistic person, is what I am. And I knew we were going to lose seats, I just didn't know how many.

Q How could you not know that and not be out of touch?

THE PRESIDENT: You didn't know it, either.

Q A lot of polls showed it.

THE PRESIDENT: Well, there was a -- I read those same polls, and I believe that -- I thought when it was all said and done, the American people would understand the importance of taxes and the importance of security. But the people have spoken, and now it's time for us to move on.


It must be real hard governing a bunch of fools.

Um, yeah...

Poor little slobs:

Two fraternity boys want to make lawsuit against "Borat" over their drunken appearance in the hit movie.

The legal action filed Thursday on their behalf claims they were duped into appearing in the spoof documentary "Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan," in which they made racist and sexist comments on camera.

The young men "engaged in behavior that they otherwise would not have engaged in," the lawsuit says.

"Borat" follows the adventures of comedian Sacha Baron Cohen's Kazakh journalist character in a blend of fiction and improvised comic encounters as he travels across the United States and mocks Americans.


Speaking of which (pay close attention to the skit at the end):

Whoop de Shit

I'd like to thank my outgoing governor for trying to take the fun (and the theoretical possibility of drunken, yet consensual, campaign volunteer sex) out of the equation for the Iowa Caucuses in 2008.

Looks like Chimpy...


just caught Dick "making romance" with his Condi magazine pics. Can naked rasslin' be far behind?

(AFP/Tim Sloan)
Krugman, usually behind a firewall but this week...free:

At the time, the right was still celebrating the illusion of victory in Iraq, and the bizarre Bush personality cult was still in full flower. But now the great revulsion has arrived.

Tuesday’s election was a truly stunning victory for the Democrats. Candidates planning to caucus with the Democrats took 24 of the 33 Senate seats at stake this year, winning seven million more votes than Republicans. In House races, Democrats received about 53 percent of the two-party vote, giving them a margin more than twice as large as the 2.5-percentage-point lead that Mr. Bush claimed as a “mandate” two years ago — and the margin would have been even bigger if many Democrats hadn’t been running unopposed.

The election wasn’t just the end of the road for Mr. Bush’s reign of error. It was also the end of the 12-year Republican dominance of Congress. The Democrats will now hold a majority in the House that is about as big as the Republicans ever achieved during that era of dominance.

Moreover, the new Democratic majority may well be much more effective than the majority the party lost in 1994. Thanks to a great regional realignment, in which a solid Northeast has replaced the solid South, Democratic control no longer depends on a bloc of Dixiecrats whose ideological sympathies were often with the other side of the aisle.


I include that paragraph for one reason, it is true and it addresses the biggest myth of this election...that these Democrats are "more conservative". Fuck that shit, it's a lie. Though it does reflect just how in the bag the media punditry is.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Idle Wombs are the Moron's Workshop

Once again, K-Lo discusses topics for which she has little familiarity, the risks and consequences of a non-dysfunction sex life.

Enough with the Women, Already [Kathryn Jean Lopez]
Another reason to be bummed about what happened Tuesday: "Hill Demographic Goes Slightly More Female"

Liberal women who treat their status as liberal women as an ideology are highly irritating — and really useful for some of the Left's worst ideas.

Two more pro-abortion women in the Senate is a bad thing and a step backward at a time when ome of liberal feminism's standards are facing some serious cultural challenges.

In other words, liberal women should be seen and not elected. Alas.
Posted at 7:31 AM


Yes, it has been a busy week for us hear at the bloggy-blog, keeping us away from what should be priority one (this blog, not our jobs). However, it is nice that in a pinch, the old reliables can still come through for you.